Saturday, August 23, 2008

My Beloved Grandma!!! RIP Ahma!!!

As most of you know that my grandma had passed away peacefully on Tuesday, 19 August 2008 at 6pm. Yes, I am still sad and shock that I had lost 2 of my beloved grandparents in less than 4 months. Is really hard to take the fact that the 2 person I really loved and have taken care of me since my childhoods day had leave this world. Am still feeling distraught with the whole event that had taken place in the last 4 months.. I really missed my grandma.. As most of my friends know that I am very closed to my grandma because she only stayed above my floor.. I stay in 6th floor and my grandma stay is 7th floor.. When I was younger, I used to sleep over my grandma house with Celina, Gavin (my younger brother) and play around and my grandma always prepared breakfast for us when we wake up.. I remember her preparing bread with jammed and a cup of Nescafe coffee.. Whatever we want to eat, she will prepared for us.. We also always go up and play with my other cousins.. We will play hide and seek and other games.. My grandma always cooks good food for us to eat, and I will miss all her food that she had always prepared for us since young till she got sick.. I will miss her hot kuay, bak chang, most of the nyonya food, and also the century porridge.. I now love to eat century porridge is because of my grandma who cook yummy century porridge for us to eat.. Whenever and whatever I want to eat, she will prepared for us.. Grandma, had always loved all of us equally.. She always remembers when is her grandchildren's birthday and will give us ang pow without fail.. Even this year, even though my grandma was sick, she still remembers my birthday.. Ahma, am so going to miss you... I know sometimes you were over worried about us and sometimes we dont understand, but i know whatever u told me, is what you are worried that it mite happen to me.. Ahma, don't worry about me, I will remembered what you say and I will take care of myself..

Am so going to miss you Ahma, I wouldn't be able to speak mandarin to you anymore, I wouldn't be able to go up to your place and see u again, I can't go up and she see u watching tv or sleeping on the bed anymore, I can't see you talking happily when everyone is there with you.. Ahma, you have always been there and always buy me what I want.. The computer u gave me when i first moved down to KL to study.. When u know that i will be buying my own computer, without hesitation you willingly gave me money to buy the computer.. when my younger brother needed a computer, u also bought it for him..

I watched TVB when I was young till now is because u taught me how to watch.. You always watch TVB dramas and will tell me the story line.. You always tape for me when I wanted to watch certain dramas but sometimes am too busy to follow the series, and you always tape for me without fail.. U remembered without me reminding you.. I used to watch TVB dramas so that I can talk to you on the dramas.. and now I am interested in watching TVB dramas even if you hardly watch after you got sick..

I know now you have left all of us and I know you are in a better place now.. I know that you wouldn't need to suffer any longer.. Is a relieved to you but is a big lost to all of us.. I will always remember that you were a fighter.. You never gave up no matter what.. Am so sorry that some of the wish i couldn't fulfill it.. I regret not being able to see you and watch the Olympics with you when you were discharged from the hospital.. Life is so unpredictable.. You were recovering so well after the blood clog and I took it for granted that you have recovered and was planning to come see you on monday after my work... But sadly you got sick on that day and I couldn't see you and you had passed away the following day.. I know that my grandma had passed away peacefully and I should be happy for her as she does not need to suffer anymore, but is still takes time to heal the pain and this is even worst when I had already lost my beloved grandpa only few months ago and now I have to take another fact that my other beloved grandma had also passed away. But I know I will be ok soon.. coz I know you won't want me to be unhappy.. Even though am emotionally down, I am glad that you do not need to suffer with the pain anymore for the pass 2 years and also the pain you had to go thru the last 2 and the half weeks in the hospital.. It really hurts me seeing you suffer when you were admitted to the hospital..I also know that you are now in a better place..

I will definitely miss you everytime I come back to Penang, or even when am watching dramas.. The habit of going up to see you everytime am free and watching dramas with you will now be in my memories as I wouldn't have a chance to do it again with you...

Life wouldn't be the same anymore. I wonder what will it be during next year CNY where u wont be there anymore.. Since u got stroke 2 years ago, u couldn't cook anymore, but u still take the trouble to instruct someone to help u cook. This coming CNY there won't be the food that you always cooked for us anymore.. We sure going to miss all the things you have done for us.. but I know that you weren't the same happy person after you got a stroke and couldn't walk anymore.. So am glad u do not need to suffer any longer..

Less than 4 months, both of my beloved grandparents had passed away.. I wouldn't be able to forget you, but I will have to stay strong to continue my life.. All the memories will always be in my heart.

I couldn't let both of you to see my graduation.. I know you always can't wait for me to graduate and see my graduation photos, but now I can't show it to you.. However, even your not here to see me graduate, I know you all will be happy for me..

Thanks Ahma for everything.. I will always remembered all the happy memories with you.. Love you lots, and am so going to miss you.. But I will stay strong as I know you wouldn't want to see me being unhappy and sad... I love you always..


Before I stop, this is a picture of my grandma...

In Memory of My Beloved Grandma..

Picture taken when we went out to eat in Penang Sport Club

Goodbye Ahma.. We will always miss you!!!

Thank you to all my friends who had been there during this difficult moment in my life. Thank you Phei Shan for calling me and coming to see me and paying the last respect to my grandma. Thank you Wye Ling and Shari-Ann for making sure I was ok.. Thank you so much to my admin staffs Kak Les. Thank you to Kak Les for her advice and being there for me. Thank you Ieta, for your sms and also being worry about me. Thank you Sherlin for being there for me even you are in New Zealand. Thank you Golda for worrying about me and talked to me on msn. Even though I only know them for a short time, they were always there for me. Thank you to all my friends who had sms and msn me when they knew about it {u know who you are.. :)}Thank you Timothy Tiah aka Ewe Tiam for calling me on the day u know the news. and also not forgetting my blogger readers for there messages. Thank you Jean Ai and Jean Mei for their messages too..Thank you so much for all our condolences and being there for me.. Thank you so much all of you.. I really appreciate it a lot.



celina said...

gosh, ur entry made me cry... its so unreal, like cannot bliv she's really gone =(

Christine said...

Celina- Dont worry, while writing this entry I was crying non-stop too.. Haha.. Yeap, we still can't accept the fact, but we have to accept it that she is really gone.. Time will heal for sure..

Falcon said...

my deepest condolence...

Christine said...

Falcon- Thanks alot